End Depression Now and Stop Dwelling on the Past - 4 Simple Introductory Steps to End Depression Now
Depression can be caused my many factors in our past. However when we habitually and obsessively rummage through our past experiences, dwelling on hurts and regrets which we perceive to have changed our lives for the worse, we often hope that 'sorting out' these experiences will make us better. Actually, it reinforces our depressive state.
A brief experience of sadness, melancholy, regret or grief is not an unnatural thing, it is in fact a beautiful part of the human experience. It is not the experience of the emotion that is the problem, but the habitual recurrence of the emotion. And the recurrence of the problem is actually caused and reinforced by the very dwelling on our past that we mistakenly think will help us out of the problem.
Why is this so?
Thinking about our past shifts our conscious awareness from what we are feeling right now, which is our point of power, into the murky world of past experience, open to re-interpretation and emotional distortion. Our subconscious wants to work out where we went wrong, as we go over and over old situations in our mind, replaying the same situations again and again, experiencing the same agony associated with that formative experience. We mistakenly believe that this will eventually lead to some kind of catharsis. Actually it reinforces the reasons why we are chronically depressed.
Are you ready? Here's 4 key steps to stop dwelling negatively on the past and assist you to end depression right now:
1. Actually, the first one is really easy, because it's really just an extension of thinking about a problem, but in much more constructive terms. It may take some time, but it is the first thing you must do. Take a pen and paper, and write down all your thoughts in a stream of consciousness style of writing. Keep the pen flowing, write down your perceptions of past experiences if you like. Don't stop until you get it all out. Don't judge anything you write, keep it honest and truthful.
For example, "I hate myself right now. I look in the mirror and I see a failure, I can't stop thinking about my clothes, my skin, my hair, my self-disgust. I feel like a failure... I feel sad about feeling like a failure. I feel ashamed of this thinking. I feel ashamed of myself. I remember by father said to me he would never forgive me for failing my exams. I hated him for that. I hated myself... I don't know what to do."
Why is this a positive step when keeping it in your head is damaging? Writing down actually acknowledges your current reality, it clearly identifies what is going on in your head, thereby stopping your thinking from becoming circular and negatively reinforcing. It's honest, direct, raw, and cleansing. However on it will own it simply serves as an emotional dumping ground. The next step is crucial.
2. You must now, having written everything down, acknowledge in writing, that all these thoughts, feelings, and experiences, while valid in one way, do not represent the real you. Acknowledge that you are beyond all the surface emotions that your mind is obsessing about. Acknowledge that you have made these experiences important, that it is your creation. Remember that the temporary emotion of sadness, regret, or anxiety, is natural, it is the mind's obsession over it which is a problem. You have created a story about your past which explains or creates what you are feeling now. It is your attachment to the story that keeps you there. Be with the story, listen to it with forgiveness, but claim yourself as more.
For example, "I am not these words or emotions. I am feeling them very strongly, but they are not me. I am more than this story, that's all it is. I created it because I wrongly assumed it meant something about me. I perceive myself as a failure, but that is not really true, just an opinion, a judgment."
3. Step 3 is simply to put yourself firmly in your place of power, in this moment, right now, by receiving gratitude into your being. There is always an opportunity to be alive and connected to yourself right now, without any baggage holding you back. You may NOT feel able to feel gratitude, nevertheless, just meet yourself right now with the fact that you are alive, and you have a choice in this moment to be fully alive.
say "I am alive and I have a choice about how I feel and the meaning I give to my life."
This step may take a simple affirmation, but I find it more useful to take a very short stroll outside and breathe gently, or even take a walk around the block, and simply reconnect to your body and your breath. Give yourself that time, please!
4. Step 4 is a vital way to finish off this simple process. You have laid the groundwork, you have met yourself, there will be no room for dwelling on the past today. Step 4 is about action. Write down 1 to 3 (no more) things you can do right now or today that will move you toward the direction of connection and openness with the world. It may be to do some more writing, it may be to phone someone, or write an email, or draw a picture. DO IT! Action must follow reflection or there will be no manifestation in your body of the healing process.
Have fun with this! With love to you.
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Depression can be caused my many factors in our past. However when we habitually and obsessively rummage through our past experiences, dwelling on hurts and regrets which we perceive to have changed our lives for the worse, we often hope that 'sorting out' these experiences will make us better. Actually, it reinforces our depressive state.
A brief experience of sadness, melancholy, regret or grief is not an unnatural thing, it is in fact a beautiful part of the human experience. It is not the experience of the emotion that is the problem, but the habitual recurrence of the emotion. And the recurrence of the problem is actually caused and reinforced by the very dwelling on our past that we mistakenly think will help us out of the problem.
Why is this so?
Thinking about our past shifts our conscious awareness from what we are feeling right now, which is our point of power, into the murky world of past experience, open to re-interpretation and emotional distortion. Our subconscious wants to work out where we went wrong, as we go over and over old situations in our mind, replaying the same situations again and again, experiencing the same agony associated with that formative experience. We mistakenly believe that this will eventually lead to some kind of catharsis. Actually it reinforces the reasons why we are chronically depressed.
Are you ready? Here's 4 key steps to stop dwelling negatively on the past and assist you to end depression right now:
1. Actually, the first one is really easy, because it's really just an extension of thinking about a problem, but in much more constructive terms. It may take some time, but it is the first thing you must do. Take a pen and paper, and write down all your thoughts in a stream of consciousness style of writing. Keep the pen flowing, write down your perceptions of past experiences if you like. Don't stop until you get it all out. Don't judge anything you write, keep it honest and truthful.
For example, "I hate myself right now. I look in the mirror and I see a failure, I can't stop thinking about my clothes, my skin, my hair, my self-disgust. I feel like a failure... I feel sad about feeling like a failure. I feel ashamed of this thinking. I feel ashamed of myself. I remember by father said to me he would never forgive me for failing my exams. I hated him for that. I hated myself... I don't know what to do."
Why is this a positive step when keeping it in your head is damaging? Writing down actually acknowledges your current reality, it clearly identifies what is going on in your head, thereby stopping your thinking from becoming circular and negatively reinforcing. It's honest, direct, raw, and cleansing. However on it will own it simply serves as an emotional dumping ground. The next step is crucial.
2. You must now, having written everything down, acknowledge in writing, that all these thoughts, feelings, and experiences, while valid in one way, do not represent the real you. Acknowledge that you are beyond all the surface emotions that your mind is obsessing about. Acknowledge that you have made these experiences important, that it is your creation. Remember that the temporary emotion of sadness, regret, or anxiety, is natural, it is the mind's obsession over it which is a problem. You have created a story about your past which explains or creates what you are feeling now. It is your attachment to the story that keeps you there. Be with the story, listen to it with forgiveness, but claim yourself as more.
For example, "I am not these words or emotions. I am feeling them very strongly, but they are not me. I am more than this story, that's all it is. I created it because I wrongly assumed it meant something about me. I perceive myself as a failure, but that is not really true, just an opinion, a judgment."
3. Step 3 is simply to put yourself firmly in your place of power, in this moment, right now, by receiving gratitude into your being. There is always an opportunity to be alive and connected to yourself right now, without any baggage holding you back. You may NOT feel able to feel gratitude, nevertheless, just meet yourself right now with the fact that you are alive, and you have a choice in this moment to be fully alive.
say "I am alive and I have a choice about how I feel and the meaning I give to my life."
This step may take a simple affirmation, but I find it more useful to take a very short stroll outside and breathe gently, or even take a walk around the block, and simply reconnect to your body and your breath. Give yourself that time, please!
4. Step 4 is a vital way to finish off this simple process. You have laid the groundwork, you have met yourself, there will be no room for dwelling on the past today. Step 4 is about action. Wri