But most of all, if you are with someone with whom your relationship gets harder over time, that is not your person. The

And yet, once again, all of these represent a fairly large turf staked out by progressives. (Just look at what’s happening in public schools systems in progressive strongholds like New York or Seattle.) It’s quite true that the Kamala Harris campaign video on “equality vs equity,” which ends with a suggestion that “everyone should end up at the same place,” doesn’t make her a communist, as a chorus of right-wing screechers proclaimed on Twitter. At the time, I actually defended Harris against accusations of this sort. But I also think there is a bit more here than a “clumsy” video, as Field suggests: it’s the fact that “equal outcomes” ideas are in the air in the progressive world and are part of background noise in the Democratic Party.,If you’re with someone who claims to love you but wants to explore “what else is out there” just a little bit more? That is not your person. If you’re with someone who says you’re perfect for them, but just not “right now?” That is not your person. If you’re with someone who you are afraid not to be with, and that fear is the reason you stay? That is not your person.,If you are with someone who you’re afraid to talk to, afraid to confront, afraid to express yourself to, out of fear that they would leave you? That is not your person. If you are with someone with whom you never argue because neither of you is being totally transparent about your needs? That is not your person.,The key difference between the relationships that last and the ones that don’t is that the ones that make it are composed of two partners who, beyond anything else, are committed to growing, to changing, to healing, and to continuing to show up for one another — no matter what.,When you’re caught between wanting to stay and go, dreaming of the sister life you could have had if you’d followed another path, and the life that could be yours if you stick it out, is there a way to know what to do?,On a related issue, it’s unquestionable that “defund the police” and/or “end policing as we know it” are slogans that have a sizable following among Democrats. (Although “defund” doesn’t mean “abolish,” using eliminationist language to refer to issues of safety and policing is just terrible branding.) In June, a majority of the Minneapolis City Council actually adopted a pledge to dismantle the police force and replace it with a new system of “public safety.” (Now, some council members are backing away from it and saying that “dismantle” is up for interpretation.) Abolition or even significant reduction of policing, by the way, is not a popular stance with the black community.,Some blamed far-left violence on “far-right provocateurs,” as did Wisconsin Lt. Gov. Mandela Barnes after a progressive state senator was beaten up by protesters. Some backed down from statements condemning both police brutality and rioting, as Sen. Chris Murphy (D-Conn.) did on Twitter. Seattle mayor Jenny Durkan (and some mainstream media outlets) defended the city’s cop-free anarchist enclave before the rainbows-and-roses fantasy ended in two murders. And even the criticism of riots has often been weak compared to the Democrats’ full-throated condemnations of racism.,There will be more than one occasion in which you think you’ve met your soulmate. They’ll send sparks into your core, the love maps will align, and you will be sure, by the virtue of your overwhelming feelings, that you have found the one person who is right for you.,People don’t couple up with the wrong person, they choose who they think is the best option, only later to actually get to know them and realize they were wrong. People don’t hang onto almost relationships because they are naive, they stay because there’s just enough good, just enough promise, just enough hope to keep them coming back.,Back in August, in an article warning that the protests could become a liability for Democrats in the election, I pointed out numerous instances in which both mainstream progressive outlets and a number of Democratic politicians were reluctant to condemn violence and lawlessness.,Behind every woman who stays with a man who can’t commit is that man promising her they have a supernatural connection. Behind every man who stays with a woman who doesn’t love him is a woman who does care, sometimes, just enough. Behind every person who stays despite the verbal abuse is a partner promising that they’ll do better, and proving it just long enough to be convincing. Behind every lukewarm couple is a flame that flickers just bright enough, just often enough, to keep it sustained.,Faster development in the Client. Usually, when there are changes in the data requirements, you would just need to modify the query and there isn’t much change required, thus allowing rapid product iterations. Both the client and server teams can work independently, provided that both the teams know the structure of the data.,A senior developer knows that there’s more than just the technical aspects of the job. The senior developer has more awareness when it comes to the business and the economic factors that justify their job’s existence than less experienced developers.,Field also objects to a passage from an article by Damon Linker in The Week listing other left-wing causes that (1) may have contributed to the Democrats’ poor down-ballot performance and (2) are currently crashing on the rocks of that poor showing. Those include Supreme Court-packing and other institutional changes that would boost and eventually entrench Democratic power, an effort to “[r]ewrite the nation’s history, with white supremacy and racism placed ‘at the very center’,” and “‘equity’ not just in opportunity but in outcomes.” She suggests that, since none of these things are part of the official Democratic agenda — simply “controversial proposals” or rhetorical mishaps that don’t reflect the party’s consensus view — the entire passage is essentially a right-wing smear.,Less experienced developers focus too much on the tech. This comes due to the fact that they don’t master their tech stack yet — which is something a senior developer does. Their primary focus is on becoming a master of their tech stack. Although it makes sense, it’s important to keep the business in mind.