I just know that my body brought actual life into this world, but I keep wanting to scold it, like it’s an unruly teen t

What to do if he is you: Take a long look in the mirror. Take stock of where you are in life and where you want to be. Can you honestly say your life is working out exactly as you’ve planned? If you see women you’ve hurt in your rearview mirror and a life that’s a bit more empty than you’d like it to be, it might be time to reassess your lifestyle and priorities. And grow the hell up.

The wording is important. The question “What would be different?” sends your brain on a mission to search for small, achievable changes you can implement to make your life just a little bit better the next day. Maybe you’ll decide to get outdoors for 20 minutes, or call an old friend for a quick catch-up session. Do this consistently over the weeks and months and those changes will start to add up.

Why just add one? Because it’s achievable. If you add more than that — if you try to go from a 3 to a 9, for example — you’ll probably feel anxious about the huge undertaking and decide to put it off for later.

She hoped to save up for another surgery, one where they’d excise all that excess skin, but she passed before she could have it done. She ended up in the hospital with complications and died of a staph infection.

I’ve always believed things happen for a reason, even the shittiest of things, but I don’t know why that happened to my poor dead aunt. I don’t know why I also feel so badly about my own body when I’ve always prided myself on being body-positive.

She lost weight, a hell of a lot in a short amount of time. Her excess skin hung off her. She could stretch it a couple of feet off her. She still had a good sense of humor about it, but anyone could tell she was hurting.

She was excited and nervous. She thought it would mean she and her husband would have sex again (they hadn’t in a very long time). She thought it would mean the end to her body hatred and discomfort.

The great thing about these two questions is that they help you improve your life in a way that doesn’t feel like work. Asking them is a one-minute habit that you can start tonight — and eventually, you may find that your happiness number has gone up. If you once had a long streak of 7s, you may now find your days mostly 8s and 9s (you might even have a handful of 10s sprinkled in there). Without doing anything drastic, you’re now a happier version of you.

I’m not of average weight right now. At six weeks postpartum, I’m 165 pounds, over 20 pounds heavier than when I got pregnant with my daughter. Officially overweight with a BMI of 28.32 (a BMI of 25–29.9 is considered overweight).

What to do if he is you: Take a long look in the mirror. Take stock of where you are in life and where you want to be. Can you honestly say your life is working out exactly as you’ve planned? If you see women you’ve hurt in your rearview mirror and a life that’s a bit more empty than you’d like it to be, it might be time to reassess your lifestyle and priorities. And grow the hell up.

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ing, uploading — they all are a huge waste of time that I would rather not deal with. I like the “Instagram filter” approach to image editing where you click through a couple options, choose the one you like best and call it a day. Chances are you won’t try to win a picture contest when all you do is upload an image to a blog post on your website.

We often think the key to a happier life is to make big, sweeping changes to the one we’re currently living. But focusing only on grand moves — changing our careers or overhauling our personalities, for example — often just leaves us feeling overwhelmed. A better strategy is to make incremental improvements. Over time, small tweaks can lead to a profound difference.

I’ve always been of average weight. I’ve spent most of my life between 130 and 140 pounds at 5’4. I’ve never even struggled much at losing weight when I’ve gained some extra.

Through solution-based therapy, I learned about a pair of questions that can help you identify exactly what you need to do to move forward each day. I’ve been asking myself these questions every night, right before bed — research shows that our brains can make creative connections while we sleep — and I’ve noticed an incredible difference in my mood and outlook. Try them yourself:

The great thing about these two questions is that they help you improve your life in a way that doesn’t feel like work. Asking them is a one-minute habit that you can start tonight — and eventually, you may find that your happiness number has gone up. If you once had a long streak of 7s, you may now find your days mostly 8s and 9s (you might even have a handful of 10s sprinkled in there). Without doing anything drastic, you’re now a happier version of you.