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But race and class are more alike when it comes to realness than class-first leftists like to admit. Socially constructed categories have real, objective consequences. The fiction of race in this country resulted in the objective facts of racism, Jim Crow, and mass incarceration, all of which involved the very real construction of institutions and hierarchies, supported by very real violence. “Race” may not be real, but when an agent of the state shoots you in the back because you are Black, that’s an extremely material oppression.

The trick is to start very small and work your way up. Work on returning that Starbucks drink they got wrong for a while then move your way up to saying no to your boss’ request that you work weekends again.

Class-first leftism is the belief that economic class is the main form of oppression in the U.S. and the world, and that other forms of discrimination relating to identity — racism, sexism, homophobia, etc.— would be relative non-issues if we could attain economic equality. Class-first leftists are a relatively small part of the left, but they have an outsize influence on intra-left debates, in part because reactionaries find aspects of their analysis congenial, and eagerly amplify them to critique other leftists. As a result, class-first leftists make it harder to fight oppression on numerous axes, including, unfortunately, class.

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ments don’t end a marriage. I know that a rough day doesn’t mean it’s over. I know that this relationship has way more pros than it does cons. It’s not abusive. It’s not toxic. It’s healthy, respectful, and it bears the fruit of our combined efforts.

Class can also kill you, through starvation, preventing you from getting medical care, or various other means. And yet, the contours of class, and the exact definition of working people or the poor, are fuzzy and arbitrary, in much the same way that the contours of any identity are fuzzy.

If compliments tend to make you uncomfortable and squeamish, it’s likely a sign that you either don’t think you deserve it or you’re worried that other people will think badly of you if you do. But whether you don’t respect yourself enough, or you respect other people’s opinions too much, the end result is the same: low self-esteem.

Luckily, taking compliments well is something you can practice and get better at. Instead of making excuses for yourself or downplaying your achievements, taking a compliment well is often as simple as smiling and saying “thank you.” And the more you practice, the more you’ll start to believe that you are actually worthy of all those compliments you get.

But if you do struggle with low self-esteem and aren’t sure why, the seven signs listed above may be useful in helping you better understand what habits and tendencies are contributing to your self-esteem issues. And more importantly, they may give you a starting point for where to begin working to build healthy and high self-esteem.

This indecisiveness in even small decisions is often the result of low confidence in your own ability to make decisions. The key is to come to terms with the fact that you will make some bad decisions (or at least decisions that other people don’t like) and that in the end, that’s okay. Nobody dies if you choose pizza for dinner even though your family wanted Chinese.

Of course, self-esteem is a complex phenomenon: there are many reasons why people can experience low self-esteem that aren’t listed here. And just because you exhibit some of these things doesn’t mean you have low self-esteem.

But if you do struggle with low self-esteem and aren’t sure why, the seven signs listed above may be useful in helping you better understand what habits and tendencies are contributing to your self-esteem issues. And more importantly, they may give you a starting point for where to begin working to build healthy and high self-esteem.

When we feel bad, we want to feel better. When we’re worried, we want to know that things will turn out alright. When we’re sad we want to feel happier and more energized. Unfortunately, many people get stuck in the habit of relying on other people’s reassurances in order to feel better. This is a problem because….

Of course, we all benefit from the support of people around us. But when you rely on it, you give up the opportunity to practice those essential skills for yourself. And the result: low confidence in your own ability to handle stressors and challenges. And eventually, low self-esteem along with it.

As Ben Burgis wrote in Arc last month, the theoretical basis of class-first leftism is the idea that “class, unlike race or gender, is an objective relationship to an economic structure.” Burgis argues that oppression by race, gender, or sexuality are based on transient identity (i.e. “race” is socially constructed and therefore not “real”). Economic structure, by contrast, is “objective” and real. Therefore, class is the real, objective form of oppression, and addressing it will address other oppressions as well. After all, people of color and LGBT people have economic problems too.

Some decisions in life are hugely important and impactful — whom you choose to marry, whether to try heroin or not, quitting your job to start your own business. These are big-time decisions with big-time consequences. And it’s perfectly understandable for people to experience some mental back and forth between deciding.