Her attention was no longer on how perfect the apologies were — but the fact that they had kept coming. There was no improvement in action that followed the promises to be better.
Good conversations are not idle talk, if we have nothing to say, we should just move on to do something better instead of making our words weigh less. And this is the first thing my friend corrected in her relationship.
The effort seemed lesser and lesser, and the fact that he understood but still didn’t change made her feel like he had stopped committing to the relationship. This happened so subliminally that my friend just started overlooking his mistakes and his apologies — she stopped taking him and their relationship too personally, just like he had.
I wondered how just in a few years, so much had changed. From feeling so much to feeling nothing at all. Her relationship was at a weak point, the furthest from the hopes she had started the relationship with. I could tell Sana was embarrassed by the betrayal she felt.
She admired how perceptive and smart he was. He had years of knowing her over most people in her life. So he would know instantly when he screwed up and would follow it up with a clear and thorough apology — it’s one of those things that just makes you feel understood. But over time, all that they had shared in understanding was months of apology after apology.
Reaching a compromise is a monumental thing because it means you worked through the differences with your partner. It lets them know you respect their POV and believe in their truth despite the difference in opinion. This kind of effort upfront means your partner believes they’re in it for the long haul.
This nurtures their individualism and separate experiences; adding more color to the relationship. When you see someone you love with distance between them and you, you’re able to appreciate them as people you don’t fully understand or have power over. You might see how others find them desirable from the same distance and put in more effort to not lose them.
When she realized the conversations had only become small talk that also ended as soon as it fulfilled the formality — she engaged in activities that would give her something to share from or be proud of. She scheduled date nights that she would save things to talk about on.
It’s like pursuing your object of affection once again as you did on the first few dates when you asked them about other parts of their life that didn’t concern or depend on you.
We have the best conversations when we are curious about our partner. When we genuinely have something to find out or something to confide in with the other person. We don’t mindlessly multitask multiple things when having a pleasant conversation — our partner saturates all our focus.
It’s impossible to stay static in life because of the different things life throws at us. What may drive a wedge in your relationship and make you feel like an outsider when this happens, is if your partner does not try to keep you in the loop about the changes. Communication and honesty can be game-changers here.
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y power plants are often erected so close to busy cities. Up to 30% of the electricity they generate can be lost in the transmission lines. This is a common problem with electrical appliances. Much of the energy is lost to heat. That is also why much of the space of a computer, for example, is devoted to cooling parts which help combat the heat generated from the circuits. Making advancements in the field of superconductors would enable us to make computers 1,000 times more powerful than the one you have in your home today. These next generation computers would be more compact, and internal superconducting connections would mean much faster processing.If your partner has mentally checked out — there are usually no active issues. And fights are less common than blatant disinterest when met with a difference of opinion. They might not bother inquiring more or instead of healthy discussions — resort to casually belittling your POV, name-calling or just shrugging it off.
Needless to say, once the interest dies in what makes your partner unique and so themselves — you’re only turning to them because you need them instead of because you want them. And desire is an essential part of a happy and healthy relationship. While it may only be a slight change in vocabulary, it shifts the very foundations of our relationships.
Conversations are the key to understanding the mind — it lets you gaze into your partner’s hopes, and dreams and even their worst fears. It lets you see who they wish to become on top of who they already are.
- If you live in a house and you have kids at home, you should not take a risk with anything.
- We hadn’t planned for that moment, but fifteen years later, it still results in a series of belly-laughs. It’s the small, unexpected moments we remember most fondly. We can’t plan or
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