To avoid being alone, Mitchell filled the Cage with visitors. One afternoon, she invited Kirsty Williams and her husband

e some families who appear to function okay to the outside world yet are riddled with dysfunctional family dynamics behind closed doors. And just because these don’t constitute abuse, or because they aren’t visible to anyone outside the family, doesn’t mean they won’t prevent kids from becoming healthy adults.

It sounds painfully impossible to “only” spend $3,000 versus $4,000 in monthly cash flow, or to “only” spend $4,000 versus $6,000 in monthly cash flow. It sounds tough to have a significant surplus left over at the end of the month. Except, it’s not. Not if you sacrifice a little and compromise a little more.

I’m under no illusion. I write these articles about personal finance from a privileged position. There’s a good chance you read them with privilege fully intact. If we spend our time thinking about building wealth rather than how to make ends meet, chances are we were born on third base. We didn’t hit a triple.

Thanks for reading! I have loads of food essays (delicious recipes too) and thoughtful and quirky simpler living essays waiting for you. (Well over 100 of them!) And this story caught the attention of NBC News in New York!

I think most people treat their housing payment as the one thing they’re gonna pay no matter what. If you miss a credit card payment (and I don’t advise it), you might face consequences, but they don’t seem quite as potentially dire as missing your rent or mortgage payment.

So, if you were living paycheck to paycheck, having to count every penny, you’d likely count each dollar until they added up to, first, your rent or mortgage and, second, your car payment. You’d worry about paying everything else last. You might tweak first and second, but I feel safe in thinking there might be general consensus here.

Mitchell was relieved when Kirtly’s boyfriend Jim moved into the Cage. “He didn’t believe in ghosts or the paranormal,” Mitchell wrote, but after several months in the Cage he “flatly refused to be left alone inside the house.” The three roommates made a pact: “Under no circumstances would we leave any one of us alone inside the old prison, for any reason at all. We began to plan our lives and daily schedules around that single, unbreakable rule.” But in October of 2006, Kirtly told Mitchell that she and Jim were moving out. They were expecting a baby. “I couldn’t blame them,” Mitchell recalled. The Cage was no place for children. By then, she was slowly accepting that it might not be a place for any living being.

If you take home $4,000 a month and want to attain financial flexibility (or freedom) ASAP, it begins and ends with your expenses. I keep my expenses — fixed and discretionary — below $3,000 (generally around $2,500) most months. If I were earning $4,000 a month, this means I have between $1,000 and $1,500 left over each month. Remember those numbers.

During a whirlwind romance, they decided to get married in Las Vegas, but Mitchell got cold feet. What if she was jumping into something that would become a nightmare, like her current real estate investment? “I cancelled it a few days before. He wasn’t the right person,” she said. They stayed in touch, but Mitchell was sleeping alone again. “I was sleepwalking,” she recalled. “Same time every night…I ended up waking up every night in the hall. By the hanging place where [the previous owner] had hung himself,” she said. It felt like the house was goading her. She’d hear voices in her head that whispered: Kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself.

So, what’s for dinner tonight? Don’t laugh. I did find cauliflower on sale— 2 for $4.00. I’m roasting one of them for an hour on a beat-up old baking sheet with olive oil and rosemary salt and the other is headed for a big pot of soup tomorrow.

Chips, pop, and other packaged goodies are easy to plow through during the workweek in front of your latest show. But they are an expensive habit and not exactly the best thing for us. (Unless you’re really into wearing stretchy pants.)

So when I say it’s easier than you think to amass $1 million in 20 years, I say it from a position of privilege to an audience largely comprised of people on the same perch. This isn’t to say hard work doesn’t get you anywhere. It does. But, speaking for myself, I’m aware I have a head start. And it has little to do with anything other than my place in life. Hard work didn’t get me here. Luck and where and when my parents decided to have sex mainly did.

Here’s how it can look on the ground. After establishing the cash flow part, it really is easy. So easy, in fact, it’s a wonder more of us don’t do exactly what I’m about to lay out.

But switch it up. Save one or two treats (or buy them the day of) for Friday or Saturday night. You’ll look forward to the small indulgence and probably find that your favorite salt and vinegar chips become special again.

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To avoid being alone, Mitchell filled the Cage with visitors. One afternoon, she invited Kirsty Williams and her husband

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