We have things in common, from our generation to our career trajectory to our mutual friends. And he understands what it

Author : 1abdo.abdo7
Publish Date : 2021-01-07 15:07:31


We have things in common, from our generation to our career trajectory to our mutual friends. And he understands what it

A lot of these advancements are powered by deep learning, in particular deep neural networks. Yet, the theory behind deep neural networks remains poorly understood. Sure, we understand the math of what individual neurons are doing, but we’re lacking a mathematical theory of the emergent behavior of entire network. What makes deep neural networks so powerful?

Modern machine learning research has demonstrated remarkable achievements. Today, we can train machines to detect objects in images, extract meaning from text, stop spam emails, drive cars, discover new drug candidates, and beat top players in Chess, Go, and countless other games.

Here’s what I believe: The idea of labeling someone a work spouse — as opposed to just a co-worker or a friend — elevates them to a higher level of intimacy. And that’s dangerous. There’s an emotional connection when you call someone your work spouse. It could (and should!) be strictly platonic. But we’re all grown-ups here; we know how humans operate. We give out titles for a reason. Wife. Husband. Friend. Best Friend. Godmother. Maid of Honor. Best Man. Titles are meant to elevate your relationship, to let others know where you stand with this person. It makes this person special.

If you are experiencing thoughts of self-harm or suicide, please do not hesitate to contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). This is a free, 24/7 confidential service that can provide people in suicidal crisis or emotional distress, or those around them, with support, information, and local resources. For more information, call or visit SuicidePreventionLifeline.org.

I’m a freelancer and I work at several publications. I only have a work spouse at one. That’s sort of a cheat — especially in 2020, because we both work from home and don’t see each other in an actual office. Also, an office spouse is generally a relationship that’s understood by the rest of the office. This is a private office marriage.

This was written in the immediate aftermath of my husband’s death by suicide. My knowledge of mental illness has evolved, with the help of much therapy for all four of us, since then. I’m sharing our experience in the hopes that it may help one family out there struggling.

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Think about this: What if the person you currently call your work spouse decides they need another work spouse. So now, they bring morning coffee to you and their second work spouse. And then they add another. Imagine your work spouse has five other work spouses. Would you be okay with that? No, you wouldn’t, because you want your work spouse to mirror an actual marriage. And for most of us, married in real life or not, that means it’s just the two of us.

In his letter to the boys, he wrote, “You will get past this, you will go to college, fall in love and marry and have families of your own. I hope you can forgive me and understand.”

Every step I took up our driveway made my legs quake, knowing, as I got closer to our front door, that I was about to cross a line separating “before” and “after,” and nothing would ever be the same.

Most people laugh off the term. “Oh, there’s my work spouse, late again. I should’ve made you breakfast this morning. Hardy-har-har.” But every time you say it, you cement the relationship, whether you want to believe so or not.

We have some guidance from mathematics. In a 1989 paper, mathematician George Cybenko, then a researcher at the University of Illinois in Urbana, proofed the Universal Approximation Theorem: for any continuous function f, there exists a single-layer neural network that can approximate f arbitrarily well, as long as the activation function of that network is sigmoid-like.

If you are experiencing thoughts of self-harm or suicide, please do not hesitate to contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). This is a free, 24/7 confidential service that can provide people in suicidal crisis or emotional distress, or those around them, with support, information, and local resources. For more information, call or visit SuicidePreventionLifeline.org.

But still, I hit him up with tech stuff I’m embarrassed to admit I don’t understand. I let my hair down a bit when we chat. I ask him about stuff that’s not strictly work-related and sometimes he makes me spit take my coffee out with his views on, well, literally anything.

My editor on this story says that it’s pretty much a mental health strategy these days to have someone functioning as an office spouse. You need someone outside of home to vent to, to support, and get support. I agree.



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