Wright suggests that the women who perpetrate these scams can’t bring themselves to take legitimate social risks so they

The only way to change the rules set out in the code is through a democratic vote where the network has to agree to change it. The chance of consensus on changing the code was almost impossible given how many voters there were. There have been several attempts to change the code that have all failed.

As I looked around for evidence of why women seem to disproportionately perpetrate these scams, I realized something else: The most proximate victims also tend to be women. In response to pleas for help, it’s often women who organize the fundraisers or start the crowdfunding pages or host the bake sales. Chuffed.org, a fundraising platform for “social causes” including personal medical expenses, reports that women make 65% of donations.

But what if Pat never had a chance, to begin with? What if he didn’t have access to health care or friends and family with deep pockets, and instead had to ask the random internet to adjudicate whether he would live or die? What if a successful crowdfunding campaign was the one thing standing between him and the chance of survival but onlookers thought it was a scam because of someone like Cindy?

But, as far as I know, no one challenged the narrative in public. I couldn’t help but wonder about my own lack of action. I didn’t want to be the person calling out a supposedly dying girl on Facebook based on a weird feeling. What if I was wrong?

The premise was simple: an internet currency, with no founder, that was fully transparent, that was publicly verifiable, with no banks in the middle to create trust, that was secured by cryptography.

In the end, Pat was too sick for the study, even though we were able to raise the money from friends and family on youcaring.com. He developed graft versus host disease — a brutal complement to his cancer related to the stem cell transplant — and I actually fell to my knees in my kitchen, like I was in a TV movie, when I got the news of his secondary infection. At that moment, I knew with a piercing certainty that Pat was going to die even though we had tried everything.

The Bitcoin creators became fed up with the existing financial system after the 2008 Financial Crisis, where the big American Banks were bailed out by the government for their reckless gambling on subprime mortgages. This event infuriated the Bitcoin creators enough to create the first ever digital currency.

In the virtual world, just as IRL, women are the default caregivers and the suppliers of empathy. And perhaps, because of that prevailing norm, the women who fake being sick are more likely to appreciate the compassion they receive for the lie, to perceive the hit of validation it delivers as a form of social currency. “I’ve taken care of people since I was young,” one busted ovarian cancer faker told a reporter. “I don’t know, something went off. I guess I was just done taking care of people.”

Pretending that you have cancer to elicit sympathy and bilk friends and family out of money is terrible for all kinds of personal reasons, but it also contributes to a much broader breakdown of an essential social compact — one where our default position is to believe people who ask for help with their extraordinary circumstances or plain bad luck.

I had another reason for not giving Cindy money: I was already tapped out from the fundraising campaign for my good friend, Pat, who really did have leukemia and really did have a stem cell transplant and really did exhaust all of his treatment options in Canada and really did need help coming up with hundreds of thousands of dollars so he could participate in an experimental study.

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these categories are limiting, but in my opinion, they will allow each style to flourish on its own and develop further. Especially because people who champion them are from very different crowds. To illustrate these styles I will provide one example from each and maybe you can make up your own mind about them.

Despite pleas from classmates to help Cindy over the course of her crowdfunding campaigns, I held onto my money. I was familiar with the range of empathy, helplessness, and determination I was supposed to feel in response to this kind of appeal, but I instead felt a terrible gnawing suspicion. I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off.

As I went down the Bitcoin rabbit hole I discovered why bitcoin was created. It was invented by Satoshi Nakamoto. I became fascinated with him, until I eventually worked out that Satoshi was almost certainly a team of developers, not one single person.

Pat died in June 2015, just days before his 35th birthday, and the unstoppable tragedy forced some of us into rueful reflection about how things could have been different, and many more of us into therapy. Five years later, I’m still not sure how to react.

I later learned that several people had doubts about Cindy’s story. “Someone tipped me off that something wasn’t right pretty early,” says C.K., a mutual friend who donated a TV to the fundraising auction for Cindy but little cash. She felt a strange sense of relief when she found out that the whole thing was a lie, largely because she had been feeling guilty. “I could have done more to help a friend from high school,” she says. “But once someone whispered [those doubts] in my ear, the wheels started turning.”