You never feel free: You can barely get through a conversation without mentioning their name. You are consumed with one

A man who frequented the Taco Bell often noticed her positive attitude and intangible qualities. He worked at a company that was much more lucrative to work at than T-Bell. He asked her to come in for an interview and now she works at that company.

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I write on the side for right now. My income from my side projects is getting close to the income from my employment. At this critical time, I’m doing what I can to get everything I can from my current work to help me in my future endeavors.

And in an effort to keep the relationship, you lose more and more of yourself. Your passions disappear. Your sense of self starts to evaporate. Life becomes an anxious, depressing effort and you have no idea how you got there.

Relationships are by definition, the way in which two people are connected to one another. When it becomes toxic, two people have become dependent on one another for how they feel. Instead of being self-sufficient and finding their value in the world by what they contribute, they depend on their partner to make them feel good.

I’ve had lapses in my own employment life — wondering why I should try so hard when this isn’t my dream job — and I always end up reminding myself that nothing is wasted and everything is a learning experience.

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ened with his wife, James grew afraid of being buried alive. He had a custom-built coffin to make sure it never happened. And when choosing his gravesite, end to end with Octavia, he had a string attached to a bell in case he was buried alive.

In place of a genuine connection between partners, you find manufactured drama. By fighting, toxic partners can feel some emotion for each other by fearing loss of the relationship. This descends into a cycle of bickering and disagreement followed by making up, maybe followed by great sex. Then, just for a moment the relationship feels like true love.

The idea was that if enough people pledge to a cause, it would be much easier for that cause to gain traction. But it wasn’t exactly political activism Andrew was interested in.

“It’s not very fair. I’ve been a customer for this company for five years and they’re hitting me with a $200 cancellation fee because it doesn’t fall on any one anniversary. […] There should be a way for us to all come together and say, ‘We refuse to pay this fee.’”

I read a story on LinkedIn recently about a girl who worked at a Taco Bell. She was extremely polite and courteous. She went above and beyond in an industry that doesn’t really reward that type of behavior.

It’s rare for a toxic person to change their behavior. More often, the only thing that varies is their target and the blame they place…If the list of people they blame is long… it’s probably only a matter of time before you’re on that list.

The problem is, when you find yourself in a bad situation, it is nearly impossible to see clearly. It isn’t just that your partner is toxic, it is that the entire environment in which you exist has become toxic. It affects your ability to think clearly, it affects your self-esteem and your life begins to shrink as you hide the truth from friends and family out of sheer embarrassment over the truth of your relationship.

A relationship that requires an injection of drama to feel connected is a relationship that has no connection. You find yourself trying to calculate what you can do to keep the other person happy. It is a downward spiral where you constantly feel in the wrong.

Andrew Mason has always had strong opinions on how the world is supposed to work. Namely, he believed in taking massive collective action against greedy capitalist overlords.